I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
Drunk is not a location!
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
Randomize
