I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
tonights recap: old cokehead freind proposed in the middle of a country bar to his trash girlfriend, saw ex-fuck who now has star shaved into his head and another with his gf, and ex-bfs best friends crackin jokes about who would fuck me first. NEVER COMING HOME AGAIN
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
When the vodka monkeys are playing a drum solo in my skull tomorrow, remind me I tried to sterilize my body from the inside with titos
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
Randomize
