You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
