If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
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