Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
One of my interns found me on Grindr. I'm really gonna make him earn the absurd amount of money I pay him.
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Randomize