I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
