I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
I know you think you’re ready to graduate but just keep these things in mind: taxes, I get up at 5 AM every morning, I have to buy vegetables when I go grocery shopping, and I can’t wear sweat pants to work. Take that victory lap and enjoy the sweat pants and bar hopping because it goes downhill real quick.
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
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