piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
Please tell me you woke up next to the hot one cause his ugly friend is still snoring in my bed and my favorite panties are ripped.
Wingwoman of the year. I'll buy you dinner tonight and a new thong. It was THAT good.
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
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