I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
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