The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize
