vagina is talking i cant
My chemistry professor just asked me if I ever found a ride home from the bar last Saturday
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
Randomize
