I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
this is a preemptive text before you call me freaking out: i have your keys and your car is parked safely a block down from your apartment.
you are a goddess
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
Remember when I was real fucked up and said I would give up utensils and only use chopsticks for lent?...just got the reminder on my phone.
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
Randomize
