if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
Are we still banned from the library?
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
Randomize
