you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
when I was too drunk to walk on my own two feet, he stole a shopping cart from the grocery store at the corner and proceeded to wheel me back to my apartment.
Then he tucked me in, gave me a goodnight kiss and slept on my sofa. I woke up this morning and he was making waffles.
he is a god among men.
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
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