he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
Randomize
