he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
Randomize
