Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
Randomize
