just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
This is a mass text. First one to reply gets head.
Before anyone claims this, this chick is in my boyfriend's phone as "Worst BJ EVER!"
Does that mean you're calling dibs or can I?
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
Randomize
