No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
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