Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
Randomize
