thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
Randomize
