how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
Randomize
