Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
Dude I got a text from you at 1:30 last night and you didn't use any vowels
Haha, I didn't want to buy any... we're in a recession you know
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
Randomize
