Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize
