i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
Randomize