is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
You layed on my kitchen floor with a pile of m&ms at your crotch, said "your lightbulb don't match, is that one new?"
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
Can I borrow your pants?
WTH?
Just come to the men’s room and help me. The blonde bartender figured out I’m married. Rachel will definitely notice if come home pantsless
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