I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
Note to self: NEVER have sex with anyone who is experiencing explosive diarrhea.
I've never been so happy to be celibate.
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