its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
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