Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Randomize
