so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
Randomize
