I woke up at 5am and he was watching me sleep... Come get meee!!??
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
Randomize
