yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
If I die tonight, wear a V neck to my funeral.
The walls in my apartment are so thin that sometimes when I fart, I stop to listen if people are laughing next door.
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
Woke up next to a tiki torch spooning a plastic flamingo on a welcome mat i've never seen before with a "happy valentines day" balloon tied to my wrist, oh yeah and "i am a cougar" is written on my chest in sharpee and all the kitchen furniture is upside down...
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
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