He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
Randomize
