it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
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