good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
The sun is gonna brush it's hairy dick across my forehead in the morning, gently whispering: "you're 4 hours late for work"
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
Randomize
