got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
When the dude you brought home from the bar on Thanksgiving leaves before you wake up ... #thankful
Decided to smoke a bowl in my closet while my parents are gone. Just sat in the closet because I couldn't remember how to get out. Started panicking cuz I thought they were gonna show up... Checked my phone. It's been 4 minutes.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
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