do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
Randomize
