Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
