I think i peed on brittanys purse
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
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