everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
Randomize
