He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
i out mim tonsoeep
After this weekend, all I can think about is bald eagles flying in front of fireworks and giving birth to fucking uncle sam. Also, beer.
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