all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
Randomize