these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
Sacagawea was the original milf.
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
Randomize
