did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
note to self: do not snort crushed up caffeine pills in the bathroom by yourself when ur super shit faced, ur face will fucking hate you in the morning.
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
Randomize
