i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
Please tell me you woke up next to the hot one cause his ugly friend is still snoring in my bed and my favorite panties are ripped.
Wingwoman of the year. I'll buy you dinner tonight and a new thong. It was THAT good.
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
Randomize
