She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
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