the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize
