It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
Randomize
