i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
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