Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
Randomize
